Soccer Dad

Dear M&M,

  There are many things that run through a Dad's head when he thinks about the miracle of having a child. "Am I grown up enough for this?", "What will they look like?", "Will I be a good Dad?", "Will I be able to even change a diaper?", "How does breast milk work?", "I will teach this boy how to pee.", "I have no idea how girls operate", and finally, especially: "I can't wait to play sports with this little being!"

  From the moment the ultrasound technician in Cooperstown complemented Marshall and said, "Do you want to know what you are having, because it is really obvious?", I knew I was having a little boy, and began thinking about where I would get his first baseball glove from. I assumed this was some kind of father-son thing, but the result was the same even with a little princess. As soon as we received the results from Maggie's blood test, I immediately started thinking about a little pink glove, and baseball bat.

  Besides baseball gloves and bats, thoughts also came through me head of footballs and basketballs. It wasn't too long after either one of you was born that you held a football for the first time. Both of you shot basketballs on your mini hoop before you could walk. As soon as you could stand, each of you took swings at your Little Tykes baseball tee. "Ball", "Throw it", "Set, Hut, Hike!", and "Shoot it, baby!", were some of your first expressions. You were both very into sports, ambidextrous, and little athletes. So I apologize for not preparing you at all for your actual very first competitive sport, Soccer.

  This past summer, Marshall joined his pre-school's soccer team. It was a structured team environment with loose rules and a very enthusiastic coach. I had already complied hours of cell phone footage of Marshall (and Maggie) playing all of the sports mentioned above. I went into the first soccer practice with a big head, and even all the confidence in the world that Marshall would be a little Pele out there showing off his natural ability. We bought some nice gear, and showed up, just in time to meet reality.

  Don't get me wrong, I do believe both of you are very talented little angels. But, as a 3 year old rolling up to his first soccer practice, I realize I made a grave mistake even you could not overcome. We had never, not not one time, kicked a soccer ball. We also had never actually played a sport with any kind of official rules. Oh, and finally, we had never played a sport with anyone else. 

  As you took the field, all decked out in athletic gear, you first tried to pick the ball up and throw it, and then run away with it. After sort of figuring out that that wasn't allowed, the coach then ditched the balls, and decided to have you all run in a single file line. You were enthusiastic for 3 seconds, until you tried to run with the 1st team, prompting me to yell, "Not yet buddy!". This put a screeching halt to any fun momentum that had developed, and just like that, I was the Dad who yelled at his kid, and had a screaming infant standing in the middle of the field. 

  Needless to say, the 1st practice was a humbling disaster. Practice #2 went a little better, as we had a week to run through a crash course in soccer, for both of us. You took the field, and things went great. However, Maggie, being it was only her 2nd soccer practice, also did not know how to be a fan. So she ran onto the field, thinking she was playing with her big brother. You ran and took your own ball, and then kicked goal after goal by yourself. We figured it out, but I missed most of the main practice, playing with my own little game of 1 on 1. From what I did see, the coach tried to make the incentive that whichever kid finished the drill last "Had to dance in front of everyone". Naturally, Marshall threw the ball aside, and danced, because that was more funny anyway.

  Practices 3 and 4 came after a week break. Things slowly rounded into form, as Maggie and I developed a sideline routine, after your Mommy let me know that it was not appropriate for me to be in the middle of the practice. Marshall figured out the drills, and even had friends on the team, given that you were seeing them at school and practice. However, you never did quite figure out how the play the scrimmages at the end. As soon as it was time for everyone to share 1 ball, instead of each having their own, it was game over for you. We did manage to meet in the middle, and you played with your own ball, alongside everyone else who shared 1. 

  While my first experience as the Dad of an athlete did not have the experience, or sports, that I expected, there was still plenty of pride. Maggie showed me she could be enthusiastic, a sideline clown, and a focused athlete when you wanted. Marshall showed me patience, to never get too cocky in myself, and somehow remain patient in the face of unexpected challenges beyond my control. I love you both, and thanks for yet another opportunity to grow, right alongside you too.

Thanks for reading.

Love,

Dad