What's In a Name - Pt. 2
Dear Maggie & Marshall,
I have already told you the super-sophisticated process that went into coming up with your names. You have both been in the world for at least half a year, and here is the solid truth about your names: your Mom and I only use them 1 out of ever 10 times. This is due to 2 reasons: 1. Full names are only used when you are in trouble, and so far you haven't been in trouble much (although it goes up every day). 2. We use nicknames in our family.
I once learned that the most beautiful sound for people to hear in any language, is their name. So here is some advice for your success in the future: use people's names when you talk to them. This kind of advice is the kind of low-hanging-fruit (which means easy) that I am the master at giving. Sorry, I am not really that wise. Even though people love hearing their name, many times a nickname is even better.
A nickname make people feel like part of the gang. *Disclaimer: Don't use generic ones too much, though, or people will think you are disrespectful, or just didn't bother to remember their name. You guys are a major part of our gang, so you have lots of nicknames. Don't worry, I do remember your names, but I just like to keep it fresh. Most of your nicknames, I think you would approve of.
Since these are constantly changing, I wanted to put a letter together, so that you can know what you were called to this point. I will leave out any names that have profanity, or could, in some way, lead you guys to think I get frustrated with you. You can just go on thinking you were perfect angels, and everything was all sunshine and rainbows.
Marshall has gone by many different names so far. For some background, when your Mom started dating, I always said "What up, Boo?". (This was a pretty common expression back in our day). Then I started calling her Boo, and eventually, Boo Bear. When we got pregnant, I started calling Marshall our Boo Cub, naturally. After you were born, Marshall Boo was an even better fit. Your favorite thing was for me to really draw your name out, getting louder all the way through, "MAAARRRRRRRSHHAAALLLLL", and once I was at a yell, say "boo" very quietly.
Well, that name was kind of long, so eventually you were back to Boo. That became Boo Baby. Your Mom used to always walk around singing that over and over. Then Boo Baby was too long, so it became "BooBa". And when that was too long, it went to "Boobs". Since "Boobs" is weird to say in public (unless your Mom and I are playing that game where you say something inappropriate and keep getting louder until someone chickens out), it was back to Boo.
From there, Marshall always had this little truck that played Yankee Doodle Dandee. For some reason, that tune made us sing "Doo-dah, doo-dah, doo-dah", which eventually stuck again as your name. So you were walking around being called "Doodah" around the time you became a big brother. This makes your proper, full, fake, real, nickname: "Mr. Marshall Boo Doodah". Make any sense? I don't think so either, but it works for us, so just go with it for now.
Maggie's nicknames have been on just as crazy of a trip. Originally, I thought "Magpie" would be our goto, but apparently that is a highly offensive insult for a person who is a lowlife, so that was thrown out in the early development phases. "Mags" worked for a while, but never felt right. Even though it is not shorter at all, Magga rolled off the tongue nicely, so that became the word.
I know you are a girl, and I know you should never do anything to mention, discuss, note, or acknowledge a girl's weight in any way. So trust me when I say that the name "Mag-A-Moo" has nothing to do with the fact that you are a very, chubby, baby. (We love it BTW, and so does everyone else). "Mag-A-Moo" has stuck around for a while, but eventually just became "Moo". Usually, we just say "Moo-Girl". You seem to like it, and as Marshall is learning his animal sounds, saying "Moo"around him usually leads to "Moo", "Roaarrrr", "Ooohh-oohh, aaahh-ahh", "Oink oink oink". Don't worry though, that is way too long for a nickname.
Earlier today (and this is the whole reason for this letter right now), I realized that the best nickname every for Maggie has been in front of my face this whole time: "Magatron". It is part Maggie, and part Megatron, an awesome robot from one of my all time favorite movies: Transformers. It also seems appropriate for your personality, because you can strike fear into anyone who opposes you with your now usual screams.
So there you have it: "Marshall Boo Doodah" and "Moo Girl" (hopefully soon Magatron), are what we call you. To be fair, you both tend to call me only with cries, or as Marshall puts it: "Deeje". Sometimes happy yells or bursts of laughter also mean "Dad", and I like that better than the word any day (although it's pretty awesome when you say that too). We come from a long line of nick namers (mine include "Slick", "Rastus", "Deeje-Peeje", and some that are not appropriate for a letter to my children). In fact, when it comes to my parents, if you show that you hate a name, it sticks forever. Luckily, you guys will love your nicknames, because they are awesome. You're welcome :)
Thanks for reading,
Love,
Dad
I have already told you the super-sophisticated process that went into coming up with your names. You have both been in the world for at least half a year, and here is the solid truth about your names: your Mom and I only use them 1 out of ever 10 times. This is due to 2 reasons: 1. Full names are only used when you are in trouble, and so far you haven't been in trouble much (although it goes up every day). 2. We use nicknames in our family.
I once learned that the most beautiful sound for people to hear in any language, is their name. So here is some advice for your success in the future: use people's names when you talk to them. This kind of advice is the kind of low-hanging-fruit (which means easy) that I am the master at giving. Sorry, I am not really that wise. Even though people love hearing their name, many times a nickname is even better.
A nickname make people feel like part of the gang. *Disclaimer: Don't use generic ones too much, though, or people will think you are disrespectful, or just didn't bother to remember their name. You guys are a major part of our gang, so you have lots of nicknames. Don't worry, I do remember your names, but I just like to keep it fresh. Most of your nicknames, I think you would approve of.
Since these are constantly changing, I wanted to put a letter together, so that you can know what you were called to this point. I will leave out any names that have profanity, or could, in some way, lead you guys to think I get frustrated with you. You can just go on thinking you were perfect angels, and everything was all sunshine and rainbows.
Well, that name was kind of long, so eventually you were back to Boo. That became Boo Baby. Your Mom used to always walk around singing that over and over. Then Boo Baby was too long, so it became "BooBa". And when that was too long, it went to "Boobs". Since "Boobs" is weird to say in public (unless your Mom and I are playing that game where you say something inappropriate and keep getting louder until someone chickens out), it was back to Boo.
I know you are a girl, and I know you should never do anything to mention, discuss, note, or acknowledge a girl's weight in any way. So trust me when I say that the name "Mag-A-Moo" has nothing to do with the fact that you are a very, chubby, baby. (We love it BTW, and so does everyone else). "Mag-A-Moo" has stuck around for a while, but eventually just became "Moo". Usually, we just say "Moo-Girl". You seem to like it, and as Marshall is learning his animal sounds, saying "Moo"around him usually leads to "Moo", "Roaarrrr", "Ooohh-oohh, aaahh-ahh", "Oink oink oink". Don't worry though, that is way too long for a nickname.
Earlier today (and this is the whole reason for this letter right now), I realized that the best nickname every for Maggie has been in front of my face this whole time: "Magatron". It is part Maggie, and part Megatron, an awesome robot from one of my all time favorite movies: Transformers. It also seems appropriate for your personality, because you can strike fear into anyone who opposes you with your now usual screams.
Thanks for reading,
Love,
Dad
Comments
Post a Comment